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    okay - am i the ONLY person in the world who can...

    okay - am i the ONLY person in the world who can kill mint?* i've been desperately trying to grow some, and every single time it DIES on me!

    sama
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    i'm green with envy!  i can't manage to get mint...

    i'm green with envy!* i can't manage to get mint to grow AT ALL !!!!

    sama
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    actually, that sounds like a wonderful idea! ...

    actually, that sounds like a wonderful idea!* many thanks, newt!*

    my son cut the grass the other day, and i hobbled along the borders pulling up clumps of grass which had enthusiastically seeded...
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    newt!  HELP!  i've been unable to walk without...

    newt!* HELP!* i've been unable to walk without crutches since major surgery last year, and my back garden resembles a rainforest!

    where do i start?* is it better to just weed with hope, or cut the...
  5. Thread: er......

    by sama
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    Newt, i'm throwing myself on your mercies! ...

    Newt, i'm throwing myself on your mercies!* again!
    i've been out of action for six months, after massive bone surgery on one foot, and i am now ruefully viewing the rough equivalent of a rainforest,...
  6. Thread: New Garden Beds

    by sama
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    how about trying lion dung pellets?  i've read...

    how about trying lion dung pellets?* i've read that they are pretty good!* any reputable gardening online store should sell 'em!* i regret to say that i am going to have to resort to these, or dried...
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    aaah, thank you newt!  thank goodness one of us...

    aaah, thank you newt!* thank goodness one of us knows what we're doing!
    sama
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    oh good grief!  what do i have to do, newt? ...

    oh good grief!* what do i have to do, newt?* invite them to dinner?* i am a total rookie now - forgotten everything i knew about gardening, after so long without one!
    how do you mean the foliage...
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    oooh, jumping in here, sorry.  does one have to...

    oooh, jumping in here, sorry.* does one have to move grape hyacinths then?* or can i leave them in the ground?* i have some with which i am delighted (well, did, unless the slugs have abseiled over...
  10. Thread: lawn nightmare!

    by sama
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    i'm in the united kingdom, quirky.  i only have a...

    i'm in the united kingdom, quirky.* i only have a very small lawn, too, but it would be nice to have it composed of more than dandelions and other unidentified horrors!* at the moment, i am just...
  11. Thread: lawn nightmare!

    by sama
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    newt!!  the sod cutter, of COURSE....NOT!!! oh...

    newt!!* the sod cutter, of COURSE....NOT!!!
    oh believe me, my angel gets walked until her legs nearly fall off, and she STILL DOESN'T RUN OUT OF ENERGY!* she doesn't understand playing yet, but i...
  12. Thread: lawn nightmare!

    by sama
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    newt!  how wonderful!!!  i want one of THOSE...

    newt!* how wonderful!!!* i want one of THOSE fulltime!!* LOL!
    yup!* got LOTS of lovely cherry tomatoes, and then....oh strewth....how do i admit this on a GARDENING FORUM?* i...er...ahem...forgot to...
  13. Thread: lawn nightmare!

    by sama
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    would really value some advice about my lawn!  it...

    would really value some advice about my lawn!* it isn't large, but it appears to be composed largely of dandelions!* i don't have the first idea what to do with it, and don't know whether to dig 'em...
  14. Thread: japanese acer

    by sama
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    heehee! okay, am off knee.... ah...well you've...

    heehee! okay, am off knee....
    ah...well you've explained just about everything that could be wrong with it, so i am now going to go and move it, and fix the soil, cos i think that's about it!!* in a...
  15. Thread: japanese acer

    by sama
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    newt, i come on bended knee to seek your help!!...

    newt, i come on bended knee to seek your help!!
    i have a japanese acer, in a pot, which is looking distinctly ropey!
    it was fine for weeks, and now it has developed lighter lines round all the...
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    i'd wager you that the hospital is still there! ...

    i'd wager you that the hospital is still there!* we don't knock 'em down often!* LOL!
    diatomaceous earth, eh....okay, thank you newt.* will go investigate!
    sama
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    er...no! they were like minute little lines of...

    er...no!
    they were like minute little lines of white.
    you would be welcome ANY time!* a newt in the hand is worth two in the pond, i always say!!!
    sama
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    they aren't any more, since i zapped 'em!!  LOL!...

    they aren't any more, since i zapped 'em!!* LOL!
    there are similarities, i have to admit.* these were tiny little white lines almost.* i didnt look too closely, newt.* just reached indoors for my...
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    i know!  i was just so furious that my tomatoes...

    i know!* i was just so furious that my tomatoes had been invaded....
    nope.* nothing flew off. they looked like little white lines, very very small.* and very, very EVERYWHERE!
    i promise faithfully...
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    NEWT!!!  zero in on this one for a second! i...

    NEWT!!!* zero in on this one for a second!

    i FOUND the CULPRITS!

    my tomatoes were going okay, then began to go brown again, wilt, and generally look like a lot of old drunks, looping over the...
  21. Thread: fuschia failure

    by sama
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    and have a stern word with it, at the same time! ...

    and have a stern word with it, at the same time!* warn it....survival of the fittest, and all that, y'know!
    fuchsias can be hideously temperamental.* what is the name of this one?
    sama
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    LOL!  american and canadian english vs english...

    LOL!* american and canadian english vs english english!* spelling can be a nightmare sometimes, can't it!*
    i balefully gave them extra water this morning, and suggested that it was a case of...
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    LOL!  glad to brighten your day, newt!  at...

    LOL!* glad to brighten your day, newt!* at present, they are the size of peas, but i live in permanent hope!
    when i make my first homegrown salad, i will raise a tomato to you!
    sama
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    LOL!  marine-sergeant gardener brigade newt!  i...

    LOL!* marine-sergeant gardener brigade newt!* i certainly will!* but..... NEWT!* i have FRUIT!
    there are THREE TOMATOES - all minute, but they are THERE!
    i am cautiously optimistic that they are...
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    newt, they are beside a six foot fence!  i...

    newt, they are beside a six foot fence!* i despair!
    :(
    i will keep persevering, though, and speak to them sternly!
    sama
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